Bumming in Bourbon Country

All good things must come to an end, and, thankfully, so too must all hellish things. I finished my internship with a shred of sanity intact and fled the scene of that crime like R. Kelly had just pulled his beretta. I'm sure I learned something worthwhile, but the main takeaways were: 1) Kentucky taxes take 20% of your check, and 2) stay away from our northern neighbors. Trailer Park Boys was a lie. These peeps be cray.

Now BB is visiting from the homeland and we're trolling the Midwest in search of bourbon and mayhem. Double points if these elements are combined. The trip thus far:

Saturday: Welcome to the 5th smallest state capital! There is nothing here. Downtown strolling and a quick trip to my former place of work to witness the horror of the animatronic coal miner in the exhibit. Unexpected bonus: terrifying animatronic guy sharpening knives! Evening ghost tour of a bourbon distillery. Unfortunate experience with 125-proof moonshine. I could tell BB had taken a drink because she was literally crying.

Sunday: Cincinnati. Can someone please explain why there's been no new construction in the Midwest since 1885? Anyway. Taft housing, river walking, Graeter's eating (disappointment, these dudes need a Braum's), and cemetery letterboxing. I got a nice neck sunburn in preparation for my return to the South.

Monday: Somehow we are still in this town. Candy factory touring (again with the bourbon balls -- even the chocolate is liquored up here), more cemetery creeping, Civil War fort climbing, and generally driving around looking at whatever this backwater has to offer. Sadly, that ended up being a fish hatchery.

Tuesday: on to Louisville!  Cemeteries, Victorian district, and an intriguing establishment known only as "Hillbilly Tea." Eventually I'll have to head home, but ain't nothing good waiting there so I'm delaying it as long as possible. More adventures to come...